Wednesday, September 15, 2010

They All Had Lemonade, The End!

We're going to be out of town for a little while in the not-so-distant future.
I've still got work that needs doing, yet, here I am, thinking about television.
Yes, television.
Allow me to explain... well, technically, it's my blog, so you don't have to allow me anything. You get the point, though.

At the doctor's office this afternoon, the television in the examining room (because folks can't keep themselves entertained for two ruddy seconds without television in this society) was on the Disney Channel. I thought nothing of it as the title of the show flashed across the screen, and the show stared up. It went a little something like this...

Even though the program was muted, my mother and I observed the horrific acting, and terrible haircuts... one of them looked like a Justin Bieber/Bobby Sherman mix...

...and it really disturbed me.

Then, no one has Paul's hair...
It took me forty-five minutes to pick out this picture. I feel this time was incredibly well spent.

Hair styles aside, this got me to thinking about a couple of things... yes, that's what we're going to talk about.
What in hell happened to Disney's quality? I mean, sure, you're not going to get the original Mickey Mouse Club back (and I had to sing the song to spell Mickey... I'll bet you did, too)...

...but even since I was a wee naif, the programming has lost it's "cute kid show" factor. Now it's just inane drivel.
I thought to myself "well, after all, it's been many a year since you watched kid shows, you silly monkey. You just grew up, that's all."
I tried to think back to the shows the Disney Channel played when I was little; if it wasn't something specially commissioned for Disney, it was - get ready for this, it'll blow your mind - actual Disney cartoons. Shock of the decade!
However, the shows that were made specially for the station were still better than the drivel I saw on the boob-tube today.
I thought you'd never ask!

This got me to thinking of other live action shows from other channels (read, Nickelodeon).
There was Repair Man (Man, Man, Man)...

(I hadn't seen this since it was new, and it still made me laugh.)

Or, one of my favorites, The Adventures of Pete and Pete...

There's not much I can say about the difference, except, for my niece... Quincy, sweetheart, come over to Aunt B's, I'll set you straight.
In the meantime, I'll just be stuck with my boring old Britcoms...

And now, it's time for the Funny Anecdote Of The Day!
I was actually at the doctor's to get some vaccinations... you know, the standard four-jabs-in-less-than-a-minute drug bomb. I don't even remember what all was injected into my system, but it's supposed to keep away cooties, and that's good enough for me.
When the nursy-nurse was finished, she stuck on the band-aids...
...and told me I had done well.
The conversation went something like this:
Nurse: You did very well.
Me: Do I get a sticker?
Nurse: We don't have stickers. Do you want a balloon?
My Internal Monologue: BALLOON!
Me: You got blue?
Nurse: Dark blue, or baby blue?
Me: Baby, please.
Nurse: It'll be waiting for you up front.

And lo, when we got back to the office, a baby blue balloon was waiting for me.
At nearly nineteen years of age, I marched through the semi-full waiting room, balloon in hand, and head held high. I regret nothing.
It's now floating about on the ceiling of my office.
I'm quite pleased with it.

Is It A Subscription Box, Or Something More Sinister? (It's A Subscription Box. Maybe.)