Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Oh, Mr. Patel...

You may have noticed (or you may not, since the rest of you have lives) that this piece of the World Wide Timesuck has been conspicuously silent over the last month or so. See, that's because my life has been an absolute nightmare, mainly consisting of trying to prepare for a week-long vacation; contrary to popular belief, I don't just browse Tumblr all day -- I had actual work to do.
Yes, work. That's it. Work.

Even though it was a truckload and a half to get ready for, and the location wasn't ideal, our little trip went rather well. Would you like to hear about the latest adventure from South Padre Island (I know, islands make me crazy, like you haven't read that before)?
There are pretty pictures at the end! Hang in there!

*The first few days of the trip were spent on the island, doing islandy things: staying in the air conditioning; wearing regular jeans, socks, closed-toed shoes, and outrageously large hats; readjusting a shade umbrella; still sweating profusely, despite these precautionary measures; and not stepping foot in the water. I was created to be a snow bunny, not a beach bum. This fact was further proven when, despite how I pleaded that my mother wear shoes in the water, she refused until I pointed out a syringe with the needle still attached that had just washed ashore. She decided it was a good idea to wear her beach shoes after that.

*On our first night, we found that some cruel human being had taken a little crab from his oceanfront property, and left him for dead. We immediately turned into the Crab Special Rescue Unit, transporting him from a picnic table in Port Isabel...

...to a safe place back on the island...

We hoped the little fella would crawl out, and go about his merry way; when we checked his release spot the next day, we saw that his shell was there, but he was gone! Hooray! Now he can go live his little crabby life in peace.

*Remember when we went to Galveston, and there was a random guy standing in the back of a cheap trailer while the towing vehicle was in full motion? That happened again. What the hell is it with guys in trailers on dinky little islands?

*We visited the sea turtle rescue, and got acquainted with some lovely rescued turtles (obviously). They have a webcam, if you would like to take a peek.

While we were at Sea Turtle Inc., I took notice of this sign on one of the tanks...

I chuckled in amusement, and vowed to look it up when I got home.
This is what I have discovered:

The I.I.C. was founded on July 8, 2004 at Boomerang Billys on South Padre Island, Texas by 5 drunken idiots. We are dedicated to furthering the pursuit of silliness, hedonistic pleasures and just plain fun.

Um, what? Are you telling me that I was right, and there's nothing more to do on that stupid island than drink and slowly loose grip with reality? Two for two in my column on this post. This is better than when we found out what HEB stands for.
I mean, hell, where else can you find Jabba the Hutt dressed up like Elvis?
This actually happened.

*When we did visit the beach, there was one particular sea gull that just creepily stared at me for about twenty minutes.
I figured it was because he'd never seen a dumber looking human in his little birdy life before; then, of course, I realized that Nigel does the same thing -- maybe Nigel's never seen a dumber looking human before, either!

*And now, for the part I had been waiting all week for: we spent most of the final day of the trip in San Antonio! Of all the traveling I've been fortunate to partake in, downtown San Antonio is still one of my favorite places to go, regardless of how many times we make the pilgrimage. While taking in the sights, we ran across some interesting folks.

The day happened to be International Peace Day, and there was a group of Hare Krishnas roaming the area, chanting the mantra. If my dad hadn't strictly forbidden me to join them in their endeavour, I think he knew I would have. As it was, I had to be content just to flash them a peace sign and a thumbs-up. They had a lovely energy about them, though, and it was lovely to see.

The Krishnas weren't the only people we encountered that night, though: for example, we were accosted in a shop by a man that had a quarter in his ear.
Yes. A real quarter was stuck in the man's ear. No one believed me, because they thought it was a hearing aid. I can assure them, though, there are no hearing aids that look like the back of a quarter.

Then, there were the people in band shirts. Regardless that I don't listen to the bands depicted on their choice of attire, I know about them. With the Internet, so many interests intertwine and you gain knowledge of things you don't actually have an interest, or any involvement in.
For example, there was a gentleman wearing an "Of Mice and Men" t-shirt.
Do I listen to them?
Do I know that Austin Carlisle is a giant teddy bear of a guy?
Of course I do! I read tour stories!
My ornery streak wanted to go up to the man and say the quote from the end of this video, just to see what reaction I would have gotten. Boy, did I have to fight that urge.

Then, of course, there was the girl wearing a "Pierce the Veil" shirt. I don't listen to them, either, but I wanted to go up to her and say "I've seen your tumblr", just to see if a look of terror spread across her face. I was feeling quite devilish that day, indeed.

*As we were traipsing through the downtown area, we stumbled upon a strange little vestibule. It looked like someone was preparing for a Victorian wake, but no one was in the vestibule to guard it. Since nobody told me no, I got one of my favorite pictures I think I've ever taken.
Bask in the awesomeness that is this photograph. This was a real place, set up for an actual purpose.

*I had heard about the "Call Me Maybe" pandemic from my sister earlier in the summer. The last time she was at Fusspot Farm, she said she had been spinning the song, along with that "Somebody That I Used To Know" thing that we all took the mickey out of on the Internet (sister contrast: I was still high on Mayday Parade's "Stay" music video at the time). I did not realize how much people must like "Call Me Maybe", because it was playing in every ruddy place we went into that had a radio.
Every. One.
I even saw people dancing to it.
Really? I mean, really? The Internet has been taking the mick out of that one, too. Speaking of which, we all love a good parody, right? This was the one I kept thinking of while wondering how so many people could go nutty for that particular song...

Also, in a sick twisting of fate, Mayday Parade has done a cover of "Somebody That I Used To Know".
AND The Maine? I'll be busy YouTube-ing on November 6. You know, between election coverage. Unless it leaks before then, that is.

So, dear reader, that's why I've not been around. That, and I prefer to take a quality over quantity approach to writing. Can you imagine what I might say if I had nothing to say at all?

Now, who wants to see holiday slides?
You do?
I knew it was too much to ask that you might actually be excited.

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